Most clients will talk to you about asset allocation, retirement income, even tax strategies. But bring up the possibility of needing long-term care, and the room goes quiet.
That silence is costing your clients emotional security—and it’s costing you an opportunity to deepen trust, win loyalty and grow your business.
I call it “Long-Term Care Talk Avoidance Syndrome.” It’s widespread, but if you can learn to navigate it with skill and empathy, you’ll separate yourself from 90% of advisors in this business.
This avoidance takes place for several reasons.
One reason is gerascophobia, the fear of aging. A Pfizer survey found that 87% of Americans have a fear of getting old, with the top fear being a decline in physical ability. It’s easier to think, “It won’t happen to me” than to picture needing assistance.
Another reason is denial. Talking about infirmities feels like inviting them in.
And, of course, there’s uncertainty about costs. Long-term care premiums, up until recently, have been ‘use it or lose it,’ not unlike car insurance.
Some advisors avoid the conversation, too. It’s emotionally loaded and can feel like you’re “killing the mood” in an otherwise upbeat meeting.
Meanwhile, the market reality is staggering. Roughly 110 million Americans are too wealthy to rely on Medicaid but not wealthy enough to self-insure without seriously impacting their estates. That’s your prime audience.
Long-term care is a good fit if you keep in mind that clients don’t want insurance. They want assurance—the confidence that their lives, and their family’s lives, won’t be thrown into chaos by a care event.
If you can have these conversations without fear or awkwardness, you create a relationship moat—a level of trust competitors can’t touch. Just as you manage investment risk, you can manage emotional risk—the anxiety, uncertainty and potential family conflict that comes when care needs aren’t planned for.
Reframe the conversation. The key is to avoid a fear presentation. Instead, make it a freedom presentation. “This isn’t about what might go wrong. It’s about making sure you control what happens next.”
Use analogies to take the sting out of the subject. I like the fire sprinkler analogy. You hope never to use them, but you’d never build a home without them.
And ground the discussion in family values, not insurance mechanics. “How would you like decisions about your care to be made? And by whom?” That reframing shifts the conversation from morbid to empowering.
Let me suggest a simple three-step approach to overcoming avoidance.
Going forward, normalize the conversation and bring it up early in your relationship with your clients. Don’t wait for an annual review. Integrate care planning into your standard wealth management process. Instead of, “We should talk about long-term care insurance,” try: “Let’s make sure your health and lifestyle plans are as bulletproof as your portfolio.”
This removes the sense that it’s an awkward add-on.
Secondly, tell the story, not the statistics. Tell the story of a client who needed care unexpectedly but had coverage. Their adult children weren’t burdened with exhausting questions: Who will provide care? Keep Mom at home or find a facility? How will we pay for this? The stress was minimized.
Contrast that with a family of equal wealth who avoided the conversation until it was too late, resulting in family tension, rushed decisions and assets liquidated at the worst time.
Stories bypass the brain’s defenses and go straight to the heart, the true decision-making center.
And thirdly, keep it simple. Present one or two clear solutions, tying each back to emotional benefits: freedom of choice, preserved dignity and family harmony.
Modern hybrid solutions, such as the EquiTrust Bridge annuity, are particularly effective because they address multiple concerns at once — providing protection without the “use it or lose it” feeling that can stall a decision.
Good things will happen when you have the long-term care discussion.
Your client retention will be strong. When you address your clients’ deepest unspoken fears, you become indispensable. Competitors can’t compare.
You will get referrals. Protecting someone’s spouse or parent turns you from “advisor” into “hero.” Heroes get introduced to friends and family.
Plus, adding long-term care is a great way to diversify your practice.
I assure you that this isn’t about selling an insurance policy. It’s about removing uncertainty before it becomes a crisis, ensuring that when care is needed, the plan is already in place, preserving dignity, protecting family unity, and keeping the client in control.
Master this conversation, and you’ll do more than grow assets under management. You’ll build a legacy of trust that will outlast any market cycle.
When you approach long-term care planning as an act of leadership, guiding clients through the conversations they instinctively avoid, you become more than a wealth manager. You become a trusted life advisor. And that’s the kind of competitive advantage that can’t be commoditized.
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